worth.

songs of solomon 4:7 says "All beautiful you are, darling, there is not flaw in you."

our Creator is perfect. we are perfect. we have fallen and are sinful and have made poor choices. but we are created to be perfect. there is no flaw in us when we are walking the path of God's great mercy and grace.

i joke with strangers that when i grow up all i want to be is a mom. and i joke with my friends that i want to meet my husband, like, right now. i joke about these things. but there's obviously a hint of truth in these jokes. it's the desire i have in my heart. and there's always a constant yearning for these things. (so much it hurts.) they become the only thing that occupies my mind. i want them worse than most things in life. i'm willing to do anything to get there.

as i read this verse, i realized that the longing i have (that is so incredibly desperate) is the same kind of longing that God has for my heart and for my thoughts. He wants them (all of them.) He doesn't want me to be giving them to anything else. He is jealous for them. He is jealous for me.

"it is a strange and beautiful eccentricity of the free God that He has allowed His heart to be emotionally identified with men. self-sufficient as He is, He wants our love and will not be satisfied till He gets it. free as He is, He has let His heart be bound to us forever." (a.w. tozer, the knowledge of the Holy)

we are created in the perfect image of God. we often forget that. we often overlook the beauty of our human selves and we forget that we are temples of the Holy Spirit. and we abuse this temple. we cover it up and break it down. we hurt it and so desperately try to use it in a way that distracts us. distract us from falling deeper in love with our Father. pulls us into an abyss of sin and hurt. but we are bound to God. He wants us to love Him (and only Him.)

here's the connection. it's okay to want those things i joke about with strangers and friend. it's okay to desire a relationship. but when we are preparing our hearts for them is when it gets hard.

we beat down these creations, these temples, these masterpieces and believe them to be useless and believe we are unworthy. unworthy of having such relationships that glorify God. so we settle. we settle for drunk guys in bars and parties with drinks and awfully butchered pick up lines. or we settle for living in an ignorant state of a friendship growing into more. we settle for being alone and bitter and angry. we settle into fear. and these are the things we think we're good enough for. because if we can pretend we're okay at church and bible study, then settling will work out just fine, right?

no. you are worth so much more than that. you are worth so much more than those lies you're fed. (you are worth far more than rubies.) you are worth being delighted in. you are worth being protected. you are worth every good thing God has to offer. God wants your love. He yearns for it. He wants it more than you ever will think He does. that's why He created you.

a worship song we sang in a incredibly broken district in the heart of san francisco two weeks goes "pull me a little closer, take me a little deeper."

whether we're single, dating, or married we have to capture our thoughts and meditate on the fact that we were created to glorify God, not ourselves. not our worldly passions and desires. we have to plead with God to pull us in closer, and to take us deeper into His embrace to fall further in love and submission with Him alone. only then will we feel strangely and beautifully bound forever to our Utmost.